I ate dinner at Huey's on Poplar tonight (had the new Madison burger; it's pretty good, but too much bun if you ask me) and ran into Jarvis Greer. I've known Jarvo since is days as a wide receiver for the tigers.When Big Jack Eaton retired, Jarvo thought he was at the top of the local sports totem pole. Well, the day I took over the sports beat at News Channel 3, I paid Jarvo a visit to let me know it was time for him to return to the back seat. Naturally, he wasn't happy about it. So in the interest of fairness, I issued him a challenge: whoever eats the most Krystal hamburgers in one hour earns the title of "dean of Memphis sports."
He accepted, so we immediately drove over to the Krystal on Union (not that one on Poplar near East High School — which is god-awful). I stood in line ahead of Jarvo and ordered fifteen Krystals (I thought that was a good number to mess with his head). As I waited for my food, Jarvo placed his order: twenty Krystals with cheese. As soon as I heard him say the word cheese, I knew the title was in the bag. He'd be lucky to get down ten of those cheese Krystals before puking.We got our food, sat down and started to eat. I had twelve in me when I noticed a look of severe pain on Jarvo's face. He'd eaten nine, but the cheese was taking a toll. I was on my fourteenth when he threw in the napkin, two bites into his eleventh and clutching his stomach in pain. To his credit, he was quite gracious in defeat. I heard he spent ten straight hours on the toilet afterwards.
For the record, Coach Ogeron (the new Rebel head coach) has a bad case of potty mouth. Come on, coach. Clean up the language.
I'm considering a move to bow ties. I think they would reflect my unique personality better than a regular necktie. Don't get me wrong — I've got nothing against neckties. But even the best neck tie only says "George!" Where a bow tie says "GEORGE!!!"